A tree gave me crap today
In Reading, I went to visit my favourite tree today. She stands outside the church in town. She is massive, growing wide limbs from low down on her trunk so that she looks something like a palm of a hand rising large into the sky. I don’t know what kind of tree she is, but she struck me so, when I first saw her, and so I visit her every time I come.
Today, I walked over to her and stood silently greeting her. There were lots of people about and I felt a little shy to hug her, but after a bit I leaned my shoulder and head on her. I waited to see if she had something to tell me but felt only the immenseness of her presence. That was good. I turned to leave and as I stepped away, a sprig of her leaves on the ground caught my attention. I felt it was a small gift from her, a piece of her. I sensed her offering it to me.
I slipped the sprig into my pocket and felt great gratitude for the gift. I would show it to my grandson, I thought, and tell him about this special tree. I could give it to him, or, as he is still very young, I might take it home, put it on my mantle to remind me of this special tree. I imagined greeting the tree through its sprig each morning, even thousands of miles away. I walked happily with my gift, my hand in my pocket holding the sprig of leaves.
About halfway to my grandson’s house, I took the sprig out to look at it. What was that? All over my hand was a smear of yellow liquidy slime- bird poop, it seemed. I turned over the sprig to see that the backs of its leaves were covered in the mustardy mess. ‘Oh crap!’ I exclaimed out loud. I set the sprig down under a tree and thoroughly wiped my hand in the grass until I had gotten as much of the smear off of me as possible.
Then I laughed out loud. My tree was a trickster, I thought.
‘It was crap!’ I said to her silently, and immediately I got the answer back, not audibly but transrationally, as sometimes happens, often as unexpected thoughts when I am deeply connected to another living being. This is a form of wisdom I have learned to appreciate from the natural world. ‘That was crap!’ I said again, laughing.
‘it wasn’t crap to you until you saw it as crap.’ came the response.
‘Ha.’
‘It was magic to you’.
‘Ha. Yes,’ I said. But the thought was nagging- ‘it was poop all along though, even if I didn’t recognize it as poop at first.’
‘It was a gift and you were full of gratitude-it is your attitude that counts.’ came another reply. I smiled-
‘ok,’ I thought, still thinking of her as a trickster- ‘nice way to teach me a lesson about gratitude and gift.’ I felt a sense of gratitude for my trickster tree and her teaching- what a good story this will tell, I thought!
It wasn’t until later in the evening, when I was falling asleep, that I suddenly heard a message again- not joking but quite serious.
‘I gave you my very best gift’. The voice of the Tree Wisdom was not stern, but she was serious. ‘
‘Those leaves are my legacy, but that poop, it is nourishment to me, it would merge with my leaves and all the other leaves and soil on the ground around me to enrich my soil, to feed my roots. I gave some of it to you- losing it to myself. It was my very best gift.’
Tears came to my eyes as gratitude welled up. I thought of little children bringing gifts of small pieces of garbage to their moms, of my cat bringing in a mouse for me, giving their best gifts. My tree gave what was precious to her- really gave of herself. How many times do I discount a gift given in generosity and pure desire to give, because it wasn’t what I wanted at the time? Do I see others’ gifts as less than worthy, when they are given as their best gifts? Can I learn to see the gift as it is given, not as it affects me, but changing my perspective, as offered by the giver when they gave it? Now I could see the real gift my tree gave me today- a gift of her wisdom. Let me learn to have gratitude for the giving, and gratitude for the gift as it is given.
REAP 